As if I didn't know what had happened all year, I decided to click on it. According to Facebook my highlights were the birthdays, anniversaries and the last picture of our beloved dog.
But to me, the best things of 2013 can't even be defined in a picture, and even words at times.
One day when I was having one of my non-rational panic attacks I started freaking out to Don about a fitted sheet. Those things seriously, never fit right. In the middle of my tantrum, while pulling my hardest to fit the sheet on the corner, I fell on my face. When I looked up, Don was standing there blinking his eyes rapidly. When I asked him what he was doing, he explained he was taking mental pictures of me because it was hilarious. It made me want to strangle him and hug him at the same time. He made me realize that I was freaking out about a fitted sheet. And it wasn't that there was a hidden meaning behind it, the sheet had gotten the best of me.
Those are highlights that Facebook seemed to miss, but it gave me the idea to take mental snapshots so when I am feeling overwhelmed or sad for no reason, I can sit back, close my eyes and flip through my mental album. Sure I may look crazy as I walk into work smiling, but its better than frowning.
A few moments I will hold close to me are as simple as my mom walking in my front door with a fresh cup from Starbucks for no reason. Watching my Dad sketch. The smell of a clean bathroom after Don cleaned it. Seeing a picture or a status update that really cracks me up.
Discovering a quote like this:
Worrying does not empty tomorrow of its troubles. It empties today of its strength.
Finding friends that share my interests. A co-worker who can dance and make me laugh. The sound of silence when all the boys have finally fallen asleep. The little tinge of excitement I get when they sleepily walk down the stairs with their bedheads in the morning. Watching my husband work.
Getting published and feeling that my parents and my best friend are not the only ones who like reading my writing.
The feeling I get after I realized that I have made it to the gym every morning even when I haven't felt like it. The even more rewarding feeling that I have accepted my post-baby body. Any buzzfeed list that includes dogs.
These are just a few of the very unexciting things I celebrate when things are starting to look bleak.
Most of the time its the things that are done behind the scenes that make me the most proud. I have accomplished things at work that have earned me recognition and that make me feel validated. But the fact that just this morning, I managed to wrangle 4 monkeys out the door including 16 gloves, 4 pairs of snow pants, 4 fleeces, 4 hats, 4 pairs of snow pants, 4 scarves, 16 boots, 4 coats and 4 dietary sound lunches and arrive to school early is down right a miracle. That deserves some kind of recognition, but I don't get an award, or a mass email congratulating me. All I get is the satisfaction of a deep breath and a pat on the back ( from myself). If I can do that day after day, I'm pretty sure I can do anything.
2013 had its highlights and low-lights. I'm thankful that I am able to recognize the difference. The very best moments have nothing to do with my job or my bank account, an exciting trip or a new baby. They are simple moments and feelings that I have made snapshots in my memory for days when I seem to forget.
Facebook couldn't possibly be able to capture that. However it did capture this as a highlight . And I will leave you with it because it makes me laugh, not only because we received an American Girl catalog, but also because of the boys visceral reaction to deface it. These kind of things are the highlights of my year and will stay closest to my heart.
I do so wish he had taken an actual picture of the fall...
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